I have just received a job offer? Should I take it up?
This question has been giving me sleepless nights the past week. What better forum to open my mind than here? My parents, husband and children are biased in this regard. My Mom, because she doesn't want her daughter to work too hard, my husband - because he knows that anything he says will be thrown back at him! "You told to work, didn't you?" or "You are the one who didn't allow me to work!" So anytime I want his opinion, I am met with scowls, glares or silence. My son can’t decide whether he wants me to work or not. He wants me to work - because he is missing those extra toys, gizmos, games he was getting while I was also providing to the family kitty, as also increased time at the computer he will be getting with no one to supervise. He doesn't, because he likes to see a relaxed Mom at home when he comes back from school!
Now I will elucidate my pros and cons. First - why should I?
The offer has been literally dropped on my lap. The company is getting the work permit too.
I guess I am qualified enough and should be feeling guilty just watching movies, bickering with kids all day.
The pay is just about decent.
It’s a recession, if I am getting something I should be grabbing it!
It will be a stepping stone back into the workplace. My little kiddo is about 3 now and this seems to be the right time.
Now - Why shouldn't I take it up?
I earn a decent amount from online writing.
I am really enjoying my swimming, music lessons and will be learning French soon ;-)
My kids need me at home (sigh - do they?)
I will still be cleaning up after the kids, sitting with their homeworks, cooking, and doing a host of other things that needs to be done with three dirty boys at home - will I endure (without turning cranky) after a hard day's work?
Do I want to go back to the rat race?
I will miss my independence (to go shopping, tea time with friends, mid morning naps;-)
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No, I dont think I want to go to the corporate sector as an employee. The word "rat race" has done the trick!
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well i think its totally your personal decision.
ReplyDeletei know & thanks for the comment!
ReplyDeleteHi , Double congrats ! Firstly for the job and secondly for deciding not to be a participant in the RAT-RACE. It is one of the most difficult decisions to take and the way you have arived at it is an extremely logical and rational one.
ReplyDeletehey so sweet of u to comment! do keep updating your blog too! what was the rational part - missing the mid morning shopping or the swimming and music lessons ?;-)
ReplyDeleteWell the rational part was "taking care of three dirty boys at home " . I m sure your hubby is not going to forgive me for this though ...
ReplyDeleteGood post you have here, mamamia. Thank you.
ReplyDeleteWow Usha - thanks for this wonderful comment. You really have thought it through with depth. Your comment reminds me of the time when my elder son could not sleep during afternoons because of a lizard on the wall. I found out about it when i found writen on the wall - "Lizards Dont Come". He was around 5 then. I think he lost the afternoon sleep habit from there!
ReplyDeleteI really admire your guts and positiveness in this area. I do admit I feel very restless sitting at home. But as someone else told me "Its better to be time rich and money poor then money rich and time poor".
Thanks again! Just tell me are you the same Usha Gour I know. Am a bit confused!
Hi Sanghamitra.Yeah I am the Usha Gour you are know (hopefully).........1994 pass out B.Arch from CET BSSR.I must say "TO WORK OR NOT" is the most difficult question I faced in my entire life. And it took quite some time before the turmoil within calmed down.I was feeling bad not so much for myself but more for my mother whose sole mission in life was to see her children grow up as good persons and get well educated. I felt guilty that I was wasting all the effort and struggle she had undergone to bring me up.
ReplyDeleteBut slowly I realized that the money you earn by not being able to spend time with your kids and family is not one of the best contribution you can make.Most of the times we try to compensation the inability to spare time by buying something or yielding to some of their outrageous demands(all through the extra money).Not to mention ,my children still get their wishes granted through their father(maybe he try to compensate for lack of time together).Even though one does not earn money by doing a regular office job.................................but still she can make a positive contribution to the development and growth of the kids and the family;which in many occasions money cannot replace.
The single important factor contributing the most for success of the whole process is you being happy.We should enjoy ,be happy and cherish the moments. Because feeling bad for yourself or feeling pity or miserable defeats the whole purpose and makes life miserable not only for you but also for the people around you.
These thoughts have given me peace and helped me to be happy and stay stable, which in turn helped my family.I know you are much more matured and rational in your thoughts. I am sure you would make the right decision.Whatever decision you take "own it" and feel good about it.Take care
Hi
ReplyDeleteI felt confused because you sounded so matured ;-) No offense meant, you are one of the most mature person I have come across (even when you glided down bannisters)!
You are right about "owning" the decision. About your mother (one of the most positive persons I have come across), I think she wanted you to be financially independent - but she would be content if you are just happy.
So you were talking of the same comment which you have forwarded me??
ReplyDeleteGreat comment indeed!